Okay, so I don't think it's the very, VERY first thing I ever stitched, but it's the first one kept by my mom. I'd guess that it's at least 30 years old.
Stitched on plastic canvas with what looks like worsted weight yarn, it's acually a pretty nice piece. The stitching tension is good, and it has another piece of plastic canvas to hide the back of the work. The edge is neatly wrapped to hold the two pieces together.
My mom used it for years too. Makes me laugh a little every time I look at it. There was a compainion piece to this one, all green with white lettering and a cute fuzzy fringe on two sides. I will have to look for it next time I visit my dad.